This is new to me. I have never really written to share 'me'. I have always been more of a "keep-my-emotions-bottled-in" kinda person. I have actually been thinking about this for a while: what it actually feels like to keep a blog. Well, I guess I am about to find out. 

About two months ago, I flipped open a new page in the book of my life: I started out as a freshman at Michigan State University. I was pretty apprehensive about taking this step because I do not really like to step out of my comfort zone and this was one of those major leaps. Two years ago, after my admission to African Leadership Academy, my mom pretty much begged me to take this chance and to put this simply, I have never been happier about listening to my mom. After this experience, I didn't treat coming to MSU like I did ALA. I was more open to meeting new people and receptive to witnessing new cultures. I just miscalculated on little thing; or rather on huge thing. School Size. ALA is a very small institution. There are at most 200 students walking the paths of that beautiful Johannesburg campus. MSU? 8000 freshmen! 8000! FRESHMEN! It's one of those things you cannot actually understand unless you are immersed in. And honestly, I wasn't prepared. 

Suddenly, I completely understood the cliché quote: you never know what you have until you lose it. The relationships I formed at ALA with my graduating class, the 'staffulty', the year group before and after mine, run much deeper than I could have imagined. I dunno why, but I somehow expected to arrive and immediately hit it off with a couple of students. Not a chance. For the first few weeks, I struggled. I missed my friends, I missed my family and I missed my teachers. I even missed Bruschi and Kayla (my Biology teacher's dogs). At this gloomy time, I could not have been more grateful for the other ALA alumni studying in MSU. It was one of the things I ignored most in my college application process, but has really meant a lot to me. 

Now, I am gaining a bit of ground. I have made some friends, hopefully long lasting ones, and after a week filled with three exams, two quizzes and a major assessment due, I might just be getting a glimpse of college life. 

It is still a bit too early but I think there's a lot MSU has to offer. I've had my first shock of what 'partying' actually does entail and having to force myself to wake up to go to church cos there's no mummy or daddy to wake me up and make me go. There’s no mummy or daddy around to make me do anything.

Even though I was in boarding school for about six years, prior to this, now, I am a lot closer to being truly independent. The have-to's are only defined on my terms as long as I am a full time student and graduate with the required number of credits. My parents, my teachers and my friends aren't here to validate my decisions. This is going to be an interesting four years and you just might catch a glimpse of what happens.

God help me.